Sunday, March 20, 2011


Disregard most of that last notice. I will not leave my best friend.

But I know now.

Five Stages

You saw it coming. It was a reaction I'm going through the five stages.

A true friend wouldn't have left you in your time of need. A true friend would have dug his feet in and staid and waited. I didn't know what to're right, the robot is real.

Up and down, no pleasure, no need to eat. Why is unimportant.

I'll wait for a sunny day and leave a note.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

(title) Goes Here

Some people believe they're above others. I've never felt that, although I've been tempted before. Some people believe they're here to rid the world of those they cannot stand. They're wrong. Will continue to be wrong. No matter how successful they think they are, until they face their own truth they won't understand.

I've been doing a lot of thinking. I'm not sure where to go from here, but my life is steadily getting better everyday. I have the most wonderful woman, the kindest family, and the task to keeping their house hold well. Right now I've high blood pressure and am pretty lethargic because of medication. But I'm sure I'll even out in a few days.

No matter how much you try to destroy me I will resist the fear. I've been beaten down enough in my life. I know someone who has better things to do, but won't, for some strange reason...I guess life is what you make it. And if that's your life, I can't tell you you're wrong. You'll just have to find out sooner or later.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

oscillation at end

I feel lost here, not crying in my room but wondering where and when.

I feel as if those cursory glances were stolen, misread when I tell truth.

I envisioned tackling and changing how they do business.

The men with their thumb drives like mine. I remember the lies they'd tell. Just to get another sell.

I can't take from people, and perhaps, then some do pity. But I never use, abuse. If I do it's without understanding.

Some would call me a robot, but that's not true either. Zombie? Nah. Tell me straight and I'll do what it is you want.

I won't lie that my mind lingers, wanders through permutations. I build and build and then am crushed under the weight.

For a season I have no reason, and then the cycle expunges my hopes. But some day that cycle will stall, and never come again.

oscillation at end.